Just Another Day in the Inquisition
by Obsian Caetus
Summary: Most of daily work for the Inquisition was quite serious, but there were days that actually tried Cassandra's patience. A series of short stories based around goofiness and other scenarios involving Cassandra. Rating will vary story to story


_**A/N** : To try and keep things fresh in my head for my creativity, I wanted to have some fun with our favorite Seeker, especially after writing Streaking Seeker. I'll be trying to do a prompt once a week and if you have suggestions, feel free to leave one in a review or PM me. Aeowyn99 was kind enough to provide this prompt:_

 _'Sera keeps hitting on her. That would be funny'_

* * *

The day the Inquisitor brought Sera back from her trip to Orlais was the day Cassandra vowed she wasn't going to let that idiot, the Inquisitor, anywhere beyond her sight. Sera… Maker, she didn't even know where to begin with this strange elven woman. Even though she was Alienage born, Sera was… well, unusual to Cassandra. She didn't behave like most elves she had met. Young, brash, and with a very odd and, at times, violent sense of equalizing justice. The Seeker had no idea what the Inquisitor saw in Sera but she was now part of the Inquisition and they were stuck with her.

"Come on Seeker, I bet they're red. No, wait… pink! Nah, pink's not really your color. Black!" Sera exclaimed, a solemn look on her face.

"Please stop." Cassandra sighed, trying her best to ignore her.

"Ugh, you're no fun, Seeker. C'mon, green! Bet I'm right." The elven woman persisted that stupid grin on her face.

"Now I'm starting to get curious." Dorian chimed in, apparently amused by the exchange.

"You're not helping." The seeker grumbled, hunching over a little and quickening her pace.

"Lavender! Oh, I bet they're lacy." Sera shouted.

"Andraste's ass, I don't have any, ok?" She snapped loudly.

Dorian snorted loudly as he tried not to double over in laughter. Cassandra felt a small flush burning her cheeks, but she refused to look at any of them. She could even feel the Inquisitor trying not to laugh and just stormed forward.

"Did… did you just say you don't wear underpants? You seriously don't have anything under your breeches?" The prankster giggled.

"I believe she did. Never would have guessed that of our most righteous Seeker." Dorian commented with an amused expression on his face, earning a laugh from the Inquisitor

Cassandra groaned and rolled her eyes in exasperation. This was annoying; Sera was annoying, Dorian was annoying… even the Inquisitor was getting under her skin today. She just wanted to go back to Skyhold and beat on one of the practice dummies for half a day. Hopefully, they'll run into some maleficar or Red Templars she can beat to a bloody pulp. Striking one of her companions, even when they irritated the living hell out of her. Sera was laughing, hands on her hips as she easily matched the Seeker's stride.

"You won your game, Sera. Leave me alone." She growled, refusing to look at her.

"No underpants, eh? Woof." Sera mused with a coy smirk.

Her flush worsened and she simply growled a swear in her native tongue at her, refusing to speak to Sera for the rest of the journey. They reached Skyhold by nightfall and she was glad to be back within the keep's solid walls. Now, she could just go to her room and be away from everyone… especially that pest, Sera. Supper would be soon and it had been a long two weeks of crossing Ferelden to return home. Cassandra bathed and put on fresh clothes. She thought of tending to her armor since it was in need of cleaning and oiling, but her stomach demanded food instead. She thought of grabbing a plate and returning to her room but since she was one of the founding members of the Inquisition and an advisor, she needed to socialize.

Everyone was at the 'inner circle' table, the Inquisitor recounting their latest mission to the rest of the group. She sat down to their right, Leliana sitting to the Inquisitor's left. There was a subtle, bitter irony to their seating arrangements and she was noticing it when they were in the war room. Even with the world changing, they both knew their rightful places during this conflict. Halfway through her meal, she felt eyes on her and looked around to see Sera looking at her before the elf's eyes slid away quickly. She scowled slightly. It was nothing, the girl was probably still laughing about earlier.

Boy… was she wrong about that.

Whenever she was in the practice yard, Cassandra could feel those hawk-like eyes watching her from the roof of the tavern. Sera had, quickly, become an annoyance. When she wasn't stalking her from the rooftops, the elf was making crude, flirty jokes that usually took Varric or Iron Bull to explain to her for her to get the point. This went on for a month before Cassandra finally got fed up with it.

"Can't you make her stop? Or at least, get her to develop some proper manners?" Cassandra demanded to the Inquisitor.

"Sera's her own person, Cassandra. I can't make her do anything. Don't tell me you're afraid of her? She's harmless for the most part." The Inquisitor said, her arms crossed.

"She keeps pestering me, both here and in the field. It is highly distracting and annoying. It's unacceptable." The Seeker protested.

"Sera does that with everyone, Cass. Come on, it can't be that bad."

Cassandra snorted with disgust and left, muttering to herself. The Inquisitor had a point, though. Since her arrival, Sera had been pulling pranks and messing with everyone in Skyhold. Granted, the woman had a better understanding and insight on the 'little people' she seemed to have spent her life fighting for. Nothing she did hurt anyone and, at times, it lifted the spirits and morale of the soldiers and other residents of the keep. The Seeker hated to admit it, but Sera had her own brand of intelligence and cunning that was helping them out. Still, her behavior around Cassandra was starting to get creepy.

One sunny afternoon, Cassandra was out in her usual private practice spot when Sera got more creepy. She was no longer satisfied with watching the Seeker from afar. She was standing there, staring at her with a sly grin on her face. Cassandra dropped the practice sword, sheen of sweat on her brow.

"What do you want, Sera?" She growled, crossing her arms.

"Just watchin'. So yer some Nevarrian princess noble, eh? Don't look much like a noble, with the scars an' all." The elf said, kicking at something in the grass.

"I will take that as a compliment then. I care not for my family and I prefer to keep it as such. Who I was born to doesn't matter to me." Cassandra huffed, loosening cuirass about to let it breathe.

"Good. Can't have too many stuffy prissy pants in the Inquisition. I hear you killed some dragons to save the Divine. That right or is someone makin' hogwash of you killin' some overgrown lizards?" The elf pressed.

Cassandra felt a twitch at the corner of her lips. Did she seriously find Sera amusing? No, she imagined it. This woman irritated the hell out of her and she needed her to go away as quickly as possible.

"I did, years ago. I suppose everyone still talks about it around here. Sera, why have you been stalking me? Your behavior lately has become more distracting than usual." She sighed.

"I distract you, Seeker? Woof." Sera teased with that infuriatingly coy smile of hers.

"Ugh, answer my question or find someone else to pester." The Seeker sighed, turning her back to her and bending to pick up the practice sword.

"Woof indeed." She chuckled before running off.

This behavior continued on for several more weeks and Cassandra had to beg for some kind of field work just to escape Sera. The Inquisitor, seeing how desperate and agitated her friend was agreed to send Cassandra out to Ferelden to deal with a pocket of Venatori trying to smuggle red lyrium north, across the Waking Sea. Iron Bull and his Chargers would accompany her, much to Cassandra's relief. At least she enjoyed Iron Bull's company and the Chargers, though odd, were a sporting and loyal bunch.

"Glad to get out of the keep finally Seeker?" Iron Bull asked as they had taken a moment to pause for lunch during their search.

"It is quite maddening to sit around and do nothing while Corypheus is attempting to burn Thedas to the ground." She retorted, setting the whetstone in her hand aside.

"Sera getting under that thick armor you call skin, eh?" He laughed, sitting down next to her.

"She is an annoyance, Bull. I don't understand how the Inquisitor can stand her." She grumbled sourly.

"Sera's not so bad once you get used to her. She's got her own quirks, but I think your problem is a bit unique, Seeker." Iron Bull chuckled, giving her a nudge with his arm.

"Unique? What do you mean?"

"I mean, come on, she flirts with you constantly. I think she's got a bit of a crush on you, Seeker, being the valiant knight that you are."

Cassandra's jaw nearly fell off at the thought of Sera having a crush on her. No, Iron Bull was only messing with her. That damnably irritating blonde was just having a go at her, always making fun of her just to raise her ire. There was nothing appealing about that woman and there certainly wasn't anything appealing about herself.

"You're making fun of me Iron Bull," She growled testily.

"Nah, I've seen this kinda thing before, a lot. Sera's young and from what I hear, she likes her ladies strong."

"Ugh, how do I get her to stop? I just want Sera to stop pestering me constantly. It is affecting my work." Cassandra sighed.

"Just let it run its course. Eventually, she'll get bored and find something or someone else. It's just harmless flirting."

Cassandra pursed her lips but perhaps Iron Bull was right. Sera was harmless and wasn't like anyone had flirted with her before though it was usually men who did so. Perhaps it was just because Sera was a girl and doing such things that were bothering her. Leliana would sometimes make the odd remark here and there but nothing serious. Perhaps she was just over-reacting. Sera was, indeed, one of the youngest members of their entourage and her behavior was, to a degree, understandable. Cassandra let out a slow breath and sighed. Just take it one day at a time she told herself. It would pass and then she would be back to her usual routine of beating on practice dummies and privately reading her romance novels.

When they returned from Skyhold, Cassandra was dreading Sera being there in the practice yard when she arrived. Instead, she went to her room and stayed there for the remainder of the day. Early the next morning, she headed to the practice yard. She figured that going early in the morning would give her the peace and quiet she sought. For once, no one was watching her and she could start her day more calmly. By mid-morning, the rest of Skyhold was bustling with activity and, surprisingly, Sera did not come slinking around. This change was a relief but as the day dragged on it started to bother her. Sure, Sera was erratic but she didn't deviate from a set behavior. After thinking it over, Cassandra shrugged it off and went to tend to her other duties.

When evening rolled around, Cassandra went to the tavern to join Iron Bull and his Chargers for a drink… only to find Sera there. She grinned and waved at Cassandra, much to her annoyance. She, luckily, found a spot at the table where she wouldn't have to sit near her. Iron Bull pushed a tankard towards her, smiling.

"Good of you to join us, Cass," He said, picking up his own drink.

"Why is she here?" Cassandra growled.

"Oh, relax and enjoy your drink. Sera's just here having fun." Iron Bull chided.

Cassandra scowled but as long as the elf stayed away from her, she could let it slide. Sera seemed completely distracted with a couple of patrons, likely making off-colored jokes or telling some ridiculous story. As the night dragged on, Sera seemed to be completely ignoring her. Normally, Cassandra would be pleased about not being the subject of Sera's attention but it felt strange after months of the girl nearly hounding her every step. But then, perhaps she counted her blessings too early because, lo and behold, Sera was coming right towards her now.

"Yer not supposed to look grumpy when you drink, Seeker." Sera teased, sitting down on the edge of the table with a bottle of wine in her hand.

"I am enjoying myself." Cassandra sighed, tipping her head back to drain her tankard.

"Always so scowly, you Seekers. Got that righteous stick so far up yer ass, you forget how to have some fun!" The elf quipped with a smug smile.

"I can have fun when I want to!" She protested indignantly.

"Oh, I'm sure you're tons of fun, Seeker. With your strong muscles and no underpants, woof."

The groan that rolled around in her throat was one of disgust and annoyance. There was that dirty flirting again. Cassandra glared at her, only making Sera laugh harder as she took a swig from her wine bottle. She could hear Iron Bull and some of the Chargers smiling in amusement as Sera made another flirtatious quip at her. The grip on her pint tightened, but Cassandra bit the inside of her cheek, deciding to just endure. This was just a phase and, eventually, Sera would get bored.

"Bet yer a riot liquored up. Loosen that stick right up if you drink somethin' stronger than that piss." Sera giggled, taking another long drink from her bottle.

"I've had enough of this insufferable pestering!" Cassandra snapped, slamming her mug down on the table.

The tavern immediately fell into a stunned silence as Cassandra, loudly, got up from her seat and stormed out of the tavern. The cold night air was a relief from the heat of her frustration burning across her face. She needed to get out of there… she was terrible at being social. A heavy sigh came from the Seeker, her shoulders slumping as she realized she probably made an embarrassment of herself back there.

"Hey, Seeker!" Sera called, catching up with her.

"Maker, have you not had your fill have making fun of me yet, Sera?" She demanded in exasperation.

"Listen, I'm just havin' some harmless fun with ya though you are just about my type, scowl and all. It's easy to tell you ain't on the other side of the fence, though." The elf said, the usual playfulness in her voice absent.

"Excuse me?"

"You ain't so bad. Bit too uptight for most people's taste but yer a right sort Cassandra. If ya cracked a smile every once in a while, it'd do us all some good, ya?" Sera said, giving her a playful punch on the shoulder.

"I hardly understand your motivations to do anything Sera. What are you talking about?" Cassandra asked brow cocked with a confused expression.

"Don't think I haven't caught ya blushin' like a ley sister. You like my compliments, especially when yer hittin' things with those muscly arms of yers. Woof woof."

Cassandra wasn't sure how to react. Just stared at her with an absolutely bewildered expression on her face. Sera laughed and winked at her before prancing back to the tavern. She was utterly dumbfounded. She heard light footfalls behind her and turned to find Leliana approaching her. She had learned to listen for her light steps though she still wondered how she could move so quickly with barely making a whisper of a sound.

"She has a point. You look less frightening to the troops when you're smiling and blushing." Leliana chuckled.

"My purpose here is not to be… appealing." Cassandra grumbled.

"No, but smiling does one some good every once in awhile. Don't be so sore about it... though I think she's quite right about your attractively muscular physique." The spymaster smirked.

"Maker preserve me."


End file.
